To Write or NOT to Write….. You tell me!




Many years ago, I had this wild idea that I wanted to be a novelist. In fact I was so enthused that I started writing. The only problem was that for some reason or another I was never able to complete anything – well with the exception of one that I can’t for the life of me find. It was saved on a floppy disc…. you remember them things?! :O 

Well this one is entitled BEHIND A SMILE. I didn’t get very far but I thought it would make for an interesting story … feedback would be greatly appreciated as well as ideas! Suffering from a serious bout of ‘writer’s block’. Art work by me. 


I’m late for work again! But I certainly didn’t care neither was I in any way inclined to feel bad about it. In fact that was the story of my life and the main reason why I had made the decision to be self employed. Otherwise I would always be reading the classified advertisements as punishment for my lack of respect for punctuality.

The word ‘hurry’ meant nothing as I slowly deliberated on which parking space I should occupy. I skillfully maneuvered the sleek blue convertible into what would seemingly be a tight fit.

Satisfied I gave myself a once over in the rear view mirror. My mouth curved into a smile and I got out. Beep! The locks and alarm activated and I walked off while tugging at my skirt which seemingly shrunk during the fifteen minute drive.

‘Another hot day’ I muttered. Luckily for me the a/c was once again running in the office. Last week was shear torture and the clients were obviously displeased.

This summer was undoubtedly hot. I pushed the door of the office that day, and walked with an air of youthful exuberance and confidence.

“Good Morning’ I chirped as I breezed pass my waiting clients who uttered low grunts in reply; all except one. He was far from annoyed judging from the devious smirk on his face.

Little did I know what was in store for me! My troublesome demeanor kicked in as I couldn’t help but give a little trouble to all who came within my path. I guess that hit first; that and the signature fragrance I was wearing. Hold on, I’m getting ahead of myself.

A smile, a flirtatious smile started it all and before I knew it I was caught in the web of yet another dramatic love affair. He sat there looking, staring and drawing me in as if the memory would fade too quickly after I left. Infatuation maybe? Or was it my imagination; I would later find out.

My cell phone rang, interrupting me from my trance. XXX ran across the screen, not again. He’d been calling all morning and I’ve been ignoring the inevitable. What is about relationships that make them go sour after the seventh month? Seven months, filled with nothing but drama and a little deceit on my part. The latter he was yet to find out but it would never be from me. Those were secrets buried deep in my past in a life I though didn’t really belong to me.

I pictured him, his determination showing on his face as he redialled my number constantly.  By now he must have been pacing the floor and been getting more and more frustrated and annoyed with each unanswered ring. Oops!

Our last conversation came back to memory; it was pointless holding a conversation.

“Baby I’ve been trying to get you all day, where the hell have you been”

“Uhhh uhmnnn busy hon … I’ve been busy with work.” I’d said.

The line went silent for a while and I crossed my legs and shifted uneasily. Silence irritated me and he knew it. I was determined not to say anything and seemingly he held that goal as well. I eventually hung up and threw the phone across the room.

Pity that’s the way things ended but it wasn’t always like that. NO, there was a time when we couldn’t get enough of each other, when each goodbye, no matter for how long was a tragedy in itself. Go with the flow I thought. This was probably normal I convinced myself until … until.

I surveyed the office; Trish had obviously left her mark as everything was spic and span. I turned the picture of Nick and I at the Blue Lagoon away from me. He was the last person I wanted to see today.

“Send in the first client” I said over the clever paging system I’d recently gotten installed.

Numbers, that’s what I’m good at. No, that’s what I’m great at. Everything else makes absolutely no sense to me. From high school it was predicted that I would follow such a career path. At lunch time I sold items, sweets of course. It was an illegal business but legitimate in every other way and properly documented. Though I eventually got caught, I was allowed to continue; just as long as I shared the profits with people who were in greater need than I was.

Seemingly, I was viewed as uptown what with daddy being a doctor and mommy dearest a lawyer. I knew better. Every dollar spent on me was provided by me. They threw me off into the sea and let me figure out how to swim on my own. Back then I found their methods of parenting strange and absurd but now I think differently.

My thoughts were interrupted by a sharp knock on the door before it slowly opened. In walked Armani; absolutely gorgeous. As I said before, I’m good with numbers so I started calculating…

To be continued…..eventually!

9 thoughts on “To Write or NOT to Write….. You tell me!

  1. Hi: Yes, I agree with the comments above. I think you need to lead us up to the point of the young man looking at you with a bit more detail. Set the scene. Also, try to avoid cliches like “signature fragrance” and “youthful exuberance.” Think of different ways of saying the same thing. The chatty tone is nice though, I agree. I think you have a good story in there! Are you going to continue with it, now?

    • I get you! and I will try to get rid of the cliches! They’re just so easy to use lol but I ought to know better than to give in! Thank you.

      Thankx. Think I want to continue with that tone but not over do it too much. I want to … but I guess I need to sit down and brain storm a bit more before I go further 🙂

      Will update!!!

  2. it’s pretty decent beginning to a story, and you can see where it’s going without giving away too much. there was a bit of confusion with the character for me. you mentioned that she doesn’t understand relationships, but she seems pretty calculating to me. and the pace is really quick: there was alot of back story filling into the short segment. could try addressing one really significant backstory, instead of several short ones. i also like the descriptions, a few more nuisances to the scenery- like that one flickering light at the bottom of the stairs- could really make it, but it’s still good. i like the conversational tone as well, a good choice for story telling.

    • Thankx. Yes I realize in reading it again that it has a whole lot going on. But I guess in going back to it I’ll clear up quite a bit of those discrepancies you picked up. Sorry, Not understanding that sentence you wrote about stairs.

      and yes I think the name will come in hehehe …. this was started about 4 years ago

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