This is Part 3 of my ‘Through the Eyes of A_Liag Explained’ series… Enjoy!!
I figured I’d let you all decide what to make of this one. It’ one of my favourites though. (In this relationship, she plays the victim role; still hurt from past experiences and uses them to pave the way for future relationships. So although now she’s met a really great person and he thinks that their relationship is unbreakable, in her mind she’s already damned it. She is convinced that he’s going to run off and leave her but she’s the really one with that intention.)
Lately I’ve been visiting quite a few other blogs. There’s one topic that’s guaranteed to be there, especially with the male bloggers – the issue of women ditching the good guys and running of with the hot-head who’ll possibly become abusive and cause serious emotional damage shortly after. I’ve got a theory but as absurd as it may seem, hear me out.
In my last poetry post (The Eyes of A_Liag Explained (2)) I started talking about it, so it’s only fair that I finish. No one likes to get hurt. Especially if it’s happened before, you subconsciously form a defensive mechanism that [should] prevent future occurrences. Unfortunately, sometimes this defence is not foolproof [ha it’s more like …foolish (-_-)] and you some how convince yourself that if you know what the end result is, you’ll be prepared for it and therefore can’t be hurt by it *looks around*. 90% of the time you end up getting way in too deep and the situation spirals out of control – Seriously though, if you think you can’t live without your man or that you’d do ANYTHING legal or not for him – please get help. Any hoooo I have strayed a bit. Given a choice of Mr. Ideal/Wonderful/I’ll introduce you to my parents and Mr. Obviously not good for me/Destructive/Unreliable, guess who I’d chose? …[If you guessed Option B = Bad, you were correct – but WHY would anyone being of some-what sound mind do such a thing?]
I once wrote in my private journal the traits of the guy I was with at the time. After reading it, I asked myself WHY I was still with him. Truth be told I knew all this about him from the very start, and even though there weren’t all direct signs, knew that he didn’t change over night (no one does). I knew exactly what I was getting into and well …. By being with him – that meant I accepted the strings that would be attached and at the end of it, I couldn’t really blame him or have reason t trash his belongings. Otherwise, I was really into his good attributes. Why did I do that? It’s what I’ve always done. Maybe that’s why I’ve never been in a relationship for more than 3 months (SHHHHHHHHH). Maybe the bottom line is that I really don’t want a lasting relationship and with the knowledge that it will be short-lived, I have no permanent expectations.
It still hurts though but how much worse and damaging would it be if you got hurt by someone who was supposed to do exactly the opposite? *Throws hands up in the air*